Insecurity … another kind of fear?

Deb’s House Concerts

What was it that Elvis and Princess Di told me that night at the river?

“Life is much too short to keep on running. Learn to face your fears and live them down … All you need is love and courage. You can change the world right where you are.”

And, I realized I need to stop being so critical of myself and what I have to offer. I created this web page, so that I can make some of my songs available for people to hear. No one has to listen to them. But, they are here if you want to listen to them.

These recordings are good enough to listen to. They’re rough. They’re casual. They are certainly not polished. But, they are free for you to listen to them. And, this way, maybe people from many places around the world will hear them because they’re available. That’s a cool thing about the internet.

Yesterday afternoon, I was thinking about what I’ve done with this website in the past week (uploaded songs with my name posted multiple times, a HUGE deal for someone who likes to live a quiet life), and I hit a “What am I doing?!” bump in the road.

I wasn’t asking myself why I’m doing this at all. I was asking myself why I’m posting recordings that are not top quality. I felt guilty for putting something out there that’s not a top quality recording.

Then, I reminded myself I’m putting the songs out for people to listen to in a place where you can hear them without paying for them. The only recordings I have of the songs I’ve posted are the ones I did with a handheld digital recorder. There is no other way for you to hear these songs at this time.

This is what I told myself: by posting these songs now as they are, I’ll stay motivated to do ’studio’ recordings as soon as possible. If I had not posted them, the moment would have passed, and I’d have moved on to something else (as I have done so many times before).

These recordings are good enough to listen to. They’re rough. They’re casual. They are certainly not polished. But, they are free for you to listen to them. And, this way, maybe people from many places around the world will hear them because they’re available. That’s a cool thing about the internet.

I think I’ve been running on adrenalin for the past few weeks, redirecting energy into these web pages to bring something good out of a bad situation (one where I believe I was wronged by people who acted subjectively and with prejudice).

For years, I’ve wanted to find a way to ‘get the music out there’, and I now I have the time and the energy to do it. It seems like a good time to take action and move in this direction.

It has been so difficult for me to do this. Somehow I’ve managed not to do this (’put my music out there’ for more than just a few people here and there) for most of my life.

This internet opportunity works for me. I enjoy computers and blogging and music. Being able to upload songs to eSnips and post to this wordpress page give me the opportunity to make these songs available to anyone who has internet access. That’s amazing and cool.

When I have some studio-recorded songs, I’ll send them to eFolkMusic, so they can be available for download there. You will be able to visit the site (without being a member), and search various music forms.

I’ll be listed on eFolkMusic in the ‘folk’ category. Once you find my songs listed, you can download the free ones or the ones available for the mp3 download price. They’ll all be ’studio’ recordings.

If you decide to join eFolkMusic, you’ll get a 100-song cd sampler (of lots of musicians) and 1000 free downloads over the next year. I think that sounds like a great deal.

An added bonus when you join eFolkMusic is that you’re supporting folk music, and folk musicians. You listen to the music you like. You find it in one location. You get free downloads. And, you support folk musicians. How much better could it get?