We All Need Praise
We all need to hear a good word now and then. If we’re honest, we probably would like to hear a good word more often than not. But, do we want flattery if it is insincere? Surely not. We don’t want to be manipulated, but we do want to be recognized in a legitimate way.
Flattery vs. Praise
Gretchen Rubin wrote about a book about flattery. She pulled from it good ideas for how to give good praise.
To put flattery in a happier context, I adapted his list to focus on giving good praise rather than flattery. Now, what’s the difference between flattery and praise? Flattery is strategic; it’s praise given for a self-serving reason.
by Gretchen Rubin
1. Be specific
2. Find a way to praise sincerely
3. Never offer praise and ask for a favor in the same conversation
4. Don’t over-praise
5. Look for something less obvious to praise
6. Don’t hesitate to praise people who get a lot of praise already.
7. Praise people behind their backs.
8. Beware when a person asks for your honest opinion.
9. Don’t damn with faint praise